[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
It hadn\u2019t been the best year, but I can honestly say I\u2019ve had worse. However, 2020 wins for Grossest Reoccurring Question<\/em> in the Fishburne House: \u201cWhy are there still slugs in my kitchen?!”<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row column_structure=”1_2,1_2″ make_equal=”on” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” text_text_color=”#ffffff” background_color=”rgba(104,74,0,0.64)” module_alignment=”left” custom_margin=”||||false|false” custom_padding=”9%|9%|1%|8%|false|false” hover_enabled=”0″ border_color_left=”#e09900″ border_width_left_tablet=”0px” border_width_left_phone=”” border_width_left_last_edited=”on|phone” global_colors_info=”{}” box_shadow_style=”preset6″ box_shadow_blur=”28px” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n The Little House<\/em>,<\/u>\u00a0by Virginia Lee Burton, was one of my favorites as a kid. I was a huge believer in the lives of inanimate objects. Jim Henson\u2019s\u00a0The Christmas Toy\u2013<\/em>\u00a0totally plausible. Raymond Briggs\u2019s\u00a0The Snowman\u2013<\/em>\u00a0required annual viewing. Disney\u2019s\u00a0Beauty and the Beast\u2013<\/em>fool, those household items were capable of song\u00a0before<\/em>\u00a0the enchantment.<\/p>\n I\u2019m a grown up now. Sure, I still name my car, talk to my books, and feel guilt over using one mug far more often than the others, but who doesn\u2019t?<\/p>\n I loved The Little House<\/em> for her expressive eyes, her loyalty, and her triumph over age and slowed metabolism.\u00a0 It\u2019s possible I\u2019ve projected my more recent emotions.<\/p>\n The callous disregard of her feelings by the humans ticked Child-Me off. How dare they \u201cHurry by without a glance\u201d? She is the hero of the story! The Little House has feelings!\u00a0<\/em>Dumb humans.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/img_8611.jpg” title_text=”little house Christina” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”5%||10%|-4%|false|false” custom_padding=”|2%|0%||false|false” hover_enabled=”0″ border_width_all=”25px” border_color_all=”#1A5025″ border_style_all=”ridge” box_shadow_style=”preset2″ box_shadow_blur=”35px” box_shadow_spread=”4px” global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n \u201cLook at this door. What a piece of garbage.\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n \u201cWhy bother filling that hole? This place isn\u2019t worth the trouble.\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n \u201cYeah it\u2019s not as old as it looks. It should probably be condemned.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n _____________<\/p>\n When we drove down the narrow farm road and first saw our house peeking over the hedges, I couldn\u2019t believe how fortunate we were.<\/p>\n I walked into the kitchen and actually said to myself:\u00a0I don\u2019t care what the rest of the house looks like.<\/em>\u00a0Fabulous kitchens in old homes have been deceiving women longer than Spanx have been disappointing prospective lovers. Counter space, an AGA, large sink, room for a\u00a0table<\/em>, and a cozy nook perfect for a desk and bookshelf seduced me from the start.<\/p>\n From the kitchen, I walked beneath stained-glass transept windows to an elegant and elaborate tiled hall.\u00a0I will sleep in this hall. I don\u2019t care what the rest of the house looks like.<\/em>\u00a0The quirks and delightful oddities of the house only further enamored me of it.<\/p>\n The peeling wall paper, the cracking entry wall, the guaranteed heating expense, the sloping and buckling floorboards, the weird shower room, the defiant glares of spiders in every single corner, blah blah blah\u00a0did you see that kitchen?<\/em><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row make_equal=”on” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][cwp_image_collage num_image=”4″ st_src_one=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/spring-gd26b31c05_640.jpg” st_src_two=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/wood-gcb1f67bf4_640.jpg” st_src_three=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/stained-glass-gc60c045a5_640.jpg” st_src_four=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/night-g189ee4f72_640.jpg” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/cwp_image_collage][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row make_equal=”on” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”|5%|||false|false” custom_padding_tablet=”” custom_padding_phone=”” custom_padding_last_edited=”on|desktop” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n The hottest English summer on record revealed windows painted shut, a nest of hornets in the laundry room\u2019s gaping hole high up in the ceiling, and an undisclosed sauna comprising the bedroom we\u2019d chosen for our youngest child.<\/p>\n The winter bestowed hundreds and hundreds of dollars in heating bills for an environment that did not qualify as even\u00a0warm<\/em>, a chandelier that leaked rain water, a cascade of water turned mold in the entryway, and external doors that did even\u00a0less<\/em>\u00a0to keep out the elements than the windows\u2013which we did not think possible.<\/p>\n Chimney issues. Septic tank issues. Radiator issues. Internet issues. Insect and arachnid issues. <\/em><\/p>\n I did not sleep in the hall.<\/p>\n I began to see the beautiful pattern as a kaleidoscope of agonies: physical, financial, emotional, and spiritual.<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” max_height=”341%” height=”211%” title_text=”kaleidoscope-1696489_640″ background_image=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/kaleidoscope-1696489_640.jpg” sticky_enabled=”0″][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n *<\/strong><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” custom_margin=”4%||||false|false” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n And then came Lockdown. There was nowhere to go. This house and I were not on good terms, and now it was not just my entire world, but everyone else\u2019s in the family. I sequestered each child in a separate room to become their office. Sam worked in his area. I ran interference between everyone and then managed to find a few moments at the kitchen table to work on my own projects. I kicked everyone outside into the grass and trees to play. I cooked many many meals in the kitchen. We watched movies in the living room kept clear of school chaos. Everyone went to bed in their own room. We had plenty of room. There was a vastness to our confinement.<\/p>\n And every once in a while, someone noticed a beautiful shimmering design on the family room carpet. It sparkled and glimmered like silver threads pulled from a forgotten tapestry. But after appreciating the art of it we realized it was a slug track. In my family room. And then on the kitchen door mat.<\/p>\n After 13 years, this is the first house in which I\u2019ll have no pregnancy or infant memories. There won\u2019t be any new Fishburnes here. When I look back on each house, there are expandable jeans, cribs, nursing, nap times, diapers, first words, and grapes cut up into nothing. This house will have tearful video chats, too much whiskey, bitter home repairs, a touch more fighting, cancelled birthday parties, and almost stepping on slugs on the way to make coffee in the dark autumn mornings. Normally, the isolation would not bother me. This has been different.<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” custom_margin=”-8%||||false|false” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n _____________<\/p>\n As lovely as the simplicity of schedules has become, in this, England\u2019s second lock down, the highlighted deficiencies in my personality are less so. And good grief, I\u2019m predictable. Without the outside world to keep my selfishness in check, I\u2019m Meteora. This is my kingdom. Do what I say. If you don\u2019t, you will be destroyed. When it\u2019s broken, it should be thrown out. When it\u2019s ugly, it should be ignored.<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”3.25″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/writersatlarge.com\/riff\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/img_8612.jpg” title_text=”Christina house 2″ align=”center” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”#1a1f82″ background_color_gradient_end=”rgba(15,15,15,0.79)” border_width_all=”10px” border_color_all=”#707070″ global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text admin_label=”Text” _builder_version=”4.10.7″ text_text_color=”#ffffff” background_color=”rgba(4,28,56,0.49)” background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” custom_margin=”0%|0%|4%|0%|false|false” custom_padding=”5%|5%|5%|5%|false|false” border_width_all=”7px” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n I\u2019ve written and painted more in 2020 than any other. I\u2019ve made soul-deep friendships. I\u2019ve never felt so much myself. Which sort of pisses me off because it\u2019s been a pretty crap year. But like I said, there have been other crap years\u2013which have eventually always resulted in something wonderful. Usually babies. Why does it take a wilderness to produce a miracle? Why do we have to be tested to prove our worth? Why are there still slugs in my house?<\/p>\n A\u00a0wilderness<\/strong>\u00a0area is a region where the land is in a natural state; where impacts from human activities are minimal. Staying in this house, with my family, away from my larger family, prevented from both distraction and accountability, has left a shimmering trail. Beauty has been left in the wake of the disgusting. Beautiful not because of what I\u2019ve done, but lovely because, though not a baby, something was born in this house. Something new is happening, and it\u2019s going to be good.<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.7″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”-5%||||false|false” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\nThings I\u2019ve said within hearing of my house:<\/span><\/strong><\/h4>\n